Criminals are human

It was one of those times, you know those times when you just fail to listen to the inner voice, and that comes back to bite you hard. Because I did not want to drive through Ojota or the old toll gate, I took a bike from Oregun Road to see a friend of mine in Magodo estate. I was heading back when I crossed back from the expressway into the Secretariat Area, not a bike in sight. I began walking away, towards Alausa, praying to see a soul, anyone walking in my direction. I don't speak Yoruba, but I planned to have a conversation in that language if my neighbour on the road knew only that talk.

I kept glancing back, may be a bike will come my way or something that comforting. I was nearing a junction, still no one in sight when I first heard it, before I knew it. Someone was running slowly but steadily behind me, catching up. The sound was muffled, who knows the kind of shoes. The street lights were not working, so it was not a jogger. Was it a ritualist? At that thought, my body shivered, adrenalin pumped and my heart raced. I chanced a backward glance and it was in time.

For as I turned, I saw two massive hands on either side of a very unkempt hair on a deadly face trying to grab me. Instinctively, I ducked and immediately veered to my right. I stumbled and was on all fours for a moment until I steadied and started running. My assailant kept up the chase and I was scared. What if he had a gun, what if his associates were just ahead, with the back of a vehicle open for me to run into? But if he was alone, what could he want from me besides my phone and money? My phone was more than 2 years old, and I sabi use phone sha. I don rock this one well well... I had just N200 in my pocket, cos a bike from Magodo to Oregun would take at most N100.

The guy was running effortlessly, but I was panting brimming with fear from every pore. What made it difficult for him to catch me was that I kept ducking and switching directions on him to throw him off. It worked, just. Then, as we neared the Christ Embassy Camp Ground, a car passed, then another. I slowed down and turned back, aided by the light. I saw it was a man, older than me, but not as well-built. I knew I could take him without breaking a sweat. With that realisation, I just stopped running. I just turned and started walking towards him. He was not expecting this, and I saw him flinch and attempt a retreat, but he stumbled and fell. Trust me, I was right on top of him.

"Why are you pursuing me?" I demanded, fists raised, my voice at my conceivable meanest. "Are you a ritualist?"

The guy smelled of alcohol and something else. He was coughing. I raised my voice in case people had noticed so they would not take me for the assailant. "You are a robber, right?"

"I am hungry," he said. "I just needed a little money for food."

"What? You are lying? You wanted to kill me!"

"With what? My bare hands?"

"So, why did you not just ask?"

"When you begin run, I think say you be JJC and you must get money well well, say may be you go use fear drop am. But you no stop, you just continue to run."

"And you continued to give chase."

"You dey run like who carry 1 million!"

I thought about this for a moment. 1 million indeed! It was funny. I laughed. I got up off him and brought out the N200 I had on me. "Make we share this one."

He looked at me, unbelief in his eyes. "So, na only N200 you get? Why you come dey run like that?"

I told him it was better to run and not be caught with peanuts or an empty pocket. He just hissed, got up and said. "Abeg, dey go your way!"

I was walking toward the Alausa bus stop, he was right behind me. I could not help but ask the question that was bugging me. "How did you end up this way?"

"You wan hear my story? Wetin you go give me? I no need pity. I jus wan eat."

I did not let him go. I kept on until we got to Oregun Road, and I saw a joint where food was sold. I bought him food and waited while he ate. The story better be good cos I spent N140.00 and I heard him belch loudly.